Day 363 | On Being a Stay at Home Mom: Point/Counterpoint

/
I've been thinking about writing this post for months and just never got motivated. Ever since recording this podcast with my friend and then listening to the second podcast in the series (in this one she interviewed a working mom), the topic has been ever-present in the back of my mind. So now, here it is: My first (but maybe not last!) point/counterpoint. I don't think this needs to be said but, as a disclaimer, this is just my perspective and everyone's decision about how to raise their child/ren is personal and I offer no judgement.

Being a Stay at Home Mom is the Best
  1. I'm around for every moment. I haven't missed a milestone in either of the boys' lives and that's pretty amazing. Although, I will point out that Chris has also missed very few. I think the boys somehow withhold doing anything too awesome when it's just me. In fact, I think Robbe's first word might very well be "dadda," obviously.
  2. We *usually* don't have to be anywhere. It's a lovely luxury to have calm, non-stressful mornings and peaceful, non-rushed evenings. Sometimes it's hard to be completely present for these moments, but it is one of my favorite things about staying home with these boys: this quiet, free time to just play or read and not be constantly doing.
  3. I'm in control. As you might have gleaned by now, I'm a *bit* of a control freak. I need to know what's going on with my babies. I need to know what the schedule is going to look like. I need to know that expectations are being appropriately set and upheld. A little obsessive? Yes. But that's what keeps this ship afloat.
  4. I accomplish a lot. I'm a really good multitasker so I do manage to get a lot done, even with two babies, during the waking and naptime hours. My ability to grocery shop, clean, cook meals, run errands, etc., means that the evening and weekend time we get with Chris can be a lot more focused family time. This is a huge deal.
  5. I'm a teacher. I don't feel like I'm doing a very good job of instilling knowledge on a daily basis but one way or another I'm raising pretty intelligent little guys. Chase knows his alphabet, colors, and shapes. He's starting to spell and learning how to rhyme. He's very well mannered as well as patient and empathetic (seriously, you've never met a more empathetic three-year-old). Robbe, although he's not talking yet, can understand practically everything. He's starting to do baby sign language more and more every day (think: all done, more, thank you, dog, bird) and is a fun-loving, affectionate little guy with more of the world opening up to him every day. It's pretty inspiring to know that I did that. More accurately, Chris and I did that, but still. It's me a lot of the time. The boys don't watch tv and Chase's preschool does very little in terms of actual knowledge development (more focused on social development), so somehow I'm doing it.

Being a Stay at Home Mom is Definitely Not the Best
  1. Every day is the same: no weekends, no vacations. Of course the days when Chris is home makes a world of difference, as does having family or visiting another place, but in reality the same challenges exist every day: same meal schedule, same nap schedule, same segmented day.
  2. Isolation. Yes, I get to hang out with other mom friends but just in case you think we sit around gabbing and drinking wine while our children peacefully play together, let me just set the record straight: typically we get about one hour, maybe two hours if we're lucky, of social time before one of us has to leave for food, naps, bedtime, etc. And those one, maybe two hours, usually involve being in two different places (me following my baby, them following theirs) most of the time. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy these times with my friends, I just wish they weren't as crazy. And other than that, it's a lot of solo, one-on-two time with my boys.
  3. Babies are exhausting. Not just chasing after them all the time (that's definitely part of it), but constantly negotiating, playing, making small talk, rearing, feeding, disciplining, cleaning up after, etc. You get the picture. And that's only part of the challenge. I'm always on. If it's not managing the kids, it's managing the house and I feel the need to be productive all the time. I could definitely check out during naptime or after bedtime but there's always something that needs to be done and since I'm home so much, it's hard to just ignore forever. 
  4. Baby talk. Chatting with a three year old, although a full-time, non-stop job, is not the most fulfilling form of social interaction. I didn't know I could start to dislike a three letter word stretched into three syllables so much (w-h-y???). I long to use the other side of my brain: I used to be a problem-solver, negotiator, creative individual when the stakes were slightly different than how to get your babies to eat vegetables. I miss that.
  5. Working seems like a luxury. The grass is always greener, right? Chris thinks I'm crazy for being jealous of his commute and work-life. Although he loves his job (yay!), he wants more than anything to be home with us. And although I love my job (babies!), I want pretty desperately to have the independence and responsibility of getting out of the house sans-babies and contributing to society. That would probably last one day, but from the outside looking in, it sure does seem lovely.

Day 362 | Balance Bike

/
Today was a rough one. Robbe caught the cold that Chase and I came down with over the weekend. Seems like no big deal, right? A little congestion isn't that big of a deal, right? Well, Robbe begs to differ. Apparently a little congestion combined with teething (two more are so close!) and a desire to suck your thumb makes for difficult sleeping situations. It does make sense.

Let's not dwell on the very limited naps he's had the last two days or the very very limited sleep either of us got last night. Instead, let's smile at the photos of Chase sporting his new [blue] helmet while working on his balance bike skills. He's going to have this thing down by the end of the summer. Mark my words.

Oh, and if it's not too much to ask, think happy thoughts for a better sleep for all of us tonight. I need all the help I can get.

Day 361 | Chicken-less Nuggets

/

I found the inspiration for this recipe when Chase was Robbe's age and have been making it sporadically (whenever I think of it) ever since. It does take a bit of extra prep time leading up to lunch so that's the main challenge for me. 

These are about the most simple chicken-less nugget imaginable. Two ingredients: tofu (I prefer the extra-firm organic variety in the square container) and whole wheat flour. Oh, and oil for the pan. 

Here's the scoop:

Cut the tofu into 1/2 by 1/2 inch strips. Once you have your strips,cut those into thirds (so they're about nugget-size).

Coat the tofu with the flour on all sides (you can add some seasoning, salt and pepper, if you prefer).

Heat oil in a pan on the stove over medium heat.

Cook until browned and turn as necessary.

There you go! Let 'em cool and feed them to the kiddos. Mine gobble them up. And I'll admit, with a little ketchup they do the trick for me, too.

Day 360 | Butterflies!

/
Today's outing has been on my DC to-do list since before I had babies. I finally finally got to see the butterflies at the National Museum of Natural History. We lucked out and got tickets by just walking in (I'm not sure if that's usually the case). You do have to pay for this exhibit but the $5 was totally worth it, in my opinion.

Chase was a little uncertain about these flying beauties (are you surprised?), but afterward they were his favorite part of the outing. Robbe, on the other hand, could not have been more excited. He squealed with excitement and pointed at all the butterflies the whole time. His reaction to the whole outing (we also watched the fishies for a bit and looked at some other animals) made me realize we need to do stuff like this more. He's really starting to take in and enjoy the world around him.

In other news, our month of visitors has come to an end. We dropped Grandma and Grandpa G. off at the airport this afternoon. In Chase's words, "I'm so sad." Back to the real world around here...

Day 359 | Checking It Off the List

/
Robbe impressed us all (and himself) by managing to walk with this giant box.
We continued the theme of being productive around the house and checking things off the list while my parents are here (I promise we're having fun, too!). Today's accomplishments? Cleaning windows, planting new plants, installing an opaque window cover, hanging our new birdhouse (I'll post a photo sometime soon), fixing a few of our bedroom doors (thanks, toothpicks!), and others that aren't popping into my head right now. Aren't we lucky to have so much help? And you can tell by the photo that the boys have been beyond helpful as well.

Day 357 | Day Out with Thomas

/
2015 is turning out to be quite a year for our little 3-year-old. Today's installment? A Day Out with Thomas.

Have we taken the train enthusiasm to the extreme? Maybe, but it was totally worth it! Chase had a blast on his first Mommy-Daddy-Chase-Grandpa Day (thanks, Mom, for hanging out with Robbe so we could go sans-baby). Oh, and Thomas being there didn't hurt.

Some of the highlights from the big event:
  • Meeting the big guy: Thomas, that is (middle photo)
  • Meeting Sir Topham Hat (top-left photo)
  • Riding on one of Thomas's coaches (top-right and bottom-left photos)
  • Train-themed crafts (stamps, coloring, necklace-making)
  • A petting zoo (What? Who would have expected that?)
  • Three train-themed kiddie rides (including a carousel)
  • Tons of real trains to tour and look at (we'll be back to the B&O Railroad Museum)
  • A toy wooden railway (like the one we have at home), which Chase proclaimed was his favorite part of the day, of course
  • And so much more!
The event as busy but really well organized and really enjoyable. We were only there for about three hours but there was enough to do to keep the kiddos entertained for much, much longer. The train ride, itself, was about 20 minutes long which was perfect for Chase's attention span. And I'm glad we opted for a morning train ride (10:45am) which enabled us to do a lot of the activities before the bulk of the crowd showed up. 

Overall, a really wonderful morning. I would highly, highly recommend for any train-loving friends. 

Day 355 | One Final Train Craft

/
Who am I kidding? There will definitely be future train crafts but I promise there will be a hiatus.

These are the party favors I made for Chase's friends. I bought standard train whistles and decided they needed some pizzazz so personalized them using the same method I did for the railroad crossing sign: Good old white glue and water.

The kiddos loved them!

Day 354 | Speaking Out

/
Before Mary Catherine headed back to Cape Cod (much to my dismay), we took a few minutes to record an episode on motherhood for her podcast Starr Struck Radio. I feel beyond honored to have been invited on the show and, I have to admit, I actually enjoyed myself.

If you're interested in my perspective on being a stay at home mom or if you just miss me and want to hear my voice (that one is geared towards you, Mom), take a listen. I think you'll enjoy it. And tune back in to listen to what Mary Catherine has to say every week. She'd be happy to be your friend, too!

You can listen by clicking the play button towards the middle of this page. Or click here to download the show (and all previous episodes) in iTunes.

Day 351 | Birthday Express

/

Our sweet three year old had an absolutely terrific train party today. A little over the top with the train theme? Maybe. A little more of a time-suck than originally anticipated? Maybe. Totally worth all the time and energy for our train-obsessed toddler? Definitely!

A few of the highlights:
  • a cupcake train (one of my favorite projects!)
  • a train banner
  • railroad tracks leading up to the front door
  • a railroad crossing sign on the door
  • a super-complex wooden train track for all of Chase's closest train friends
  • the Thomas roller coaster, obviously
  • food trains with all the fruits/veggies and taco fixings
  • a special birthday mantle with representations of some of his favorite things
  • a cardboard choo choo engine

Day 348 | Lucky Boy

/
Can you believe how lucky this little guy is? His very own Thomas roller coaster! Thanks to Grandma and Grandpa M, we have the perfect toddler activity for Chase's birthday party. If the other kids enjoy the ride even a quarter as much as Chase, it'll be a huge hit.

And don't worry, it's not a permanent fixture in our basement. It'll be moving outdoors soon!

Day 345 | Adulthood

/
You know you're an adult when...

A new garden shed is about the most exciting purchase ever! Our stroller has a new home (as does a bunch of other random stuff). I've been schlepping the double stroller up flights of stairs for over a year now and our single stroller before that for two years wasn't a picnic either. It now has a happy parking spot behind our house. Woohoo!

Special shoutouts:

-Chris for mastering the assembly. This thing was no joke. 
-Brian, a true friend, for offering up his vehicle and muscles for the pick up and delivery of the giant box. 
-Chase for offering quality control and supervisory assistance throughout the day. And for being the first item to happily reside in the new shed (for at least a few seconds).